Artist: Tool
Song: Forty-six & 2
Album: Aenima
Mood: Positive change and happiness
It has been a good two+ months since I have written a post on this blog. And it is not for lack of inspiration, plenty of emotions have been passing through this heart and brain of mine. Instead, it was a lack of time at work. Honestly, I technically don’t even have time to write today’s post, but you know what, I don’t care. I meant to literally write this post back in September, but the feelings still apply, so here goes!
There is a reason Tool has always been one of my favorite bands and has inspired multiple posts here at this blog: Maynard Keenan has the uncanny ability to express my deepest emotions, not just the ones that cloud the surface. If you read any of my posts over the summer, you know they weren’t the happiest, and I desperately wished for change in the fall. Whether it was pure luck or my own mind telling me to shut up and make the changes myself, the fall did, and has, ushered in the positive changes I longed for.
While I still do not comprehend the meaning behind the title “Forty-six & 2,” I do understand and relate to the meaning behind the lyrics. Keenan compares personal reflection and internal change to the shedding of skin, “Change is coming through my shadow/My shadow’s shedding skin.” Beforehand, Keenan admits to giving into self pity, “I’ve been wallowing in my own confused/And insecure delusions.” If there is anything humans know how to do well, it’s giving into our insecurities.
But I do believe a little bit of wallowing is a good thing. I needed the time to be sad so that I could work through my emotions. But once August hit, I couldn’t take it anymore. I was ready to move on. As Keenan so beautifully puts in this dark, chugging song, “I choose to live and to/Grow, take and give and to/Move, learn and love …/To do what it takes to move through.”
Although this won’t be my last “metamorphosis,” I hope the next changes in my life will continue to be positive ones.
Possibly Related Posts:
- Trusting My Sensible Heart
- The Chill Sounds of Egypt
- Trying to Be a Fighter
- Stand Up to Be Stronger
- Together We Will Live Forever
